"[The Pharisees] loved the approval of men rather than the approval of God." John 12:43

   As a man, it is really easy for me to want to be told frequently how awesome I am. I love having my ego stroked. I desire words of affirmation. I want to know that I am needed. But often, this desire for affirmation turns into a malignant pride which spoils everything in my life. Soon things turn sour; they don't mean as much because they are never enough. When I seek the approval of men more than I do the approval of God - which I do a lot, I must confess - I am essentially leading a cosmic coup against my Creator because I am stealing the throne of my own life. Pride will do that in you if you let it. Pride is a thief, and it will swindle you out of every last mental, relational, and spiritual penny if you let. This is the profile on pride:


1. Pride steals your worship. You cannot worship God and yourself. No one has the capacity for two objects of worship. It is one or the other. God is clear that he alone is to be worshiped. But frequently I hear from my evil heart that I should be worshiped. That is pride, and it is idolatry.


2. Pride steals your joy. Pride is a desert. It allows no one else to take prominence in your life. You can't appreciate relationships because they never measure up. And it prevents others from becoming as valuable to you as they should be because it is afraid they might take the spotlight off you. And when you are the only one around, joy is not on the menu.

Pride is a thief.

3. Pride steals the truth. Pride is a lie. In contrast, humility is the truth. Humility is an accurate assessment of your identity. Pride says that you are greater - or even lesser (which is a form of pride) - than you really are. Everyone else can see it, but you. It would be funny if it weren't so tragic how pride can so distort our vision of reality. It is so obvious to others, but a prideful person can never seem to see how messed they have become. Pride also distorts the line between "need" and "want." You think you need something, but you really just want it really bad. Pride removes truth from the picture.


4. Pride steals safety. Pride hurts others. It puts them into a "not-good-enough" category. It is always wanting more. It asks of them things they cannot do, and when they don't live up to your expectations, shunning them, reprimanding them, or even hurting them becomes reasonable. I have to confess this one often. It is so often that I think that I really need words of affirmation, but I really just want to have my ego stroked. God has been helping me to see the difference, but it is always something I need to be careful of because I know I can hurt others or put them down, when they don't provide me with what I want. Pride is a vicious beast.


   I hope you quickly recognize pride in your life. Pinpointing areas where you have a cancerous pride growth protruding is a vital exercise in your Christian life. It is the difference between idolatry and acceptable worship. But it is so hard to do. Ask a trusted friend. Say, "Have you noticed any areas in my life where I am full of pride?" Then, have the humility to confess this to God and anyone else you might have hurt with your pride. Finally, continually monitor your pride level and confess it. Your Pride-O-Meter should be sensitive enough to react before people get hurt. But if not, you need to get used to confession - to God and others. This is the first step to worshiping God fully and passionately. You don't excise pride by focusing on your pride; that is just another form of pride. You are looking at you still. You cut pride out by looking at
Christ and falling more and more and more and more and more in love him. And when you have done that, you won't be looking at yourself anymore, and you will notice that you are not in a desert any longer, but in the lush forest of worship.


"Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his face continually." Psalm 105:4


Love Christ.

"He who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, 'From his innermost being will flow rivers of living water.'"

John 7:38

   I have been drinking a lot lately. No, not that kind of drinking. I have been drinking from the living water inside me. I don't know why, but the enemy has been really trying to discourage me and throw me down with all kinds of doubts lately. Every time I am alone, some kind of doubt about a glorious truth in my life is hurled in my direction. Constantly I am doubting things. I am asking whether it could possibly true, all the things I have been believing.

   What I have learned through it all is that I need God's truth to be flowing through me. I need the river of living water to wash over me in those moments. So I begin reciting what I know to be true about me and my situation.

"I am loved by God."

I have been drinking a lot lately...

"All things work together for those who love God."

"It's probably not as bad as I making it out to be."

"The Holy Spirit lives in me and in (the other person)."

"I need time to think this over, rather than getting emotional about it."

"The fruit of the Spirit is patience."

"The fruit of the Spirit is joy."

"Jesus overcame way more than this to love me."

"I don't deserve anything I have, let alone what I am wanting."

"Thank you Jesus for the wonderful things I already have in my life." 

"Heaven is still my home."

"God is always good, even when it doesn't feel like it."

"God knows what he is doing."

"God already knows what is going to happen and he isn't freaking out."

And so on...

   When you do that, you are speaking truth over yourself. And in doing so, you are being refreshed more and more. Your thirst for satisfaction or recognition or worth is being quenched, and you are given a greater love for God. The more I drink from the river that never runs dry, the more I am in awe of the beauty and greatness of our God. And it is my prayer that every one of you who reads this will be encouraged to run to that river often and drink up.

---

(This also applies to a Christian brother or sister you may know who is really struggling with doubts. You can speak truth and greatness over them. You can draw out the rivers of living water from within them too.)

"Therefore, if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering." Matthew 5:23-24

   Repentance. Quickly reconciling with others. Humbly repenting before God. There is something extremely difficult about all three of these. They are not easy, nor are they designed to be. But these three things are considered more important in our worship experience than presenting an offering before God. God desires this aspect of our worship before he requires any type of sacrifice from us, whether that be our songs of praise, our sacrifice of time, the use of our talents or treasures, or anything else we do for God. He wants our hearts. The primary wellspring of our worship is to be our hearts. Until God sees that our hearts are clean, pure, and right with him and others, whatever we do in "worship," doesn't really matter.

Oh the drudgery of humility...

   I have been learning this lesson a lot recently. There are so many times that I am just plain stupid. I hurt others with what I say, don't say, how I look at them, or even how I think about them. and in order for my fellowship with God to be restored, I have to repent. This is no fun. It means I have to first, face what I did in all of its ugliness. No one likes facing what they did, and that includes me. This is why so many people try to ignore what they have done, or excuse it. This is because if they can pretend they never did it, then they don't have to deal with it. But God calls his worshipers to admit what they have done.

   And once I did that, I had to confess to God that it was wrong. Again, that is not fun. It is admitting I failed. It is saying I was not right. It is confessing that I am not as smart, charming, important, or in control as I thought I was. Oh, the drudgery of humility. Honestly, I don't like being humble. It is the pits. To put myself out of the picture is painful. But I can tell you with every part of my heart, that there is freedom in humility.

   Finally, once I confessed my failure before God, I had to take that confession out the door of my heart and into my mouth. I had to confess my failure to the person I offended each time. This is where the rubber meets the road. This is where the confession of your heart to God is proven to be genuine. And this is where healing happens. James 5:16 says, "Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much." (Side note for those who have been offended: if your offender comes to you to reconcile, there is a command in this verse for you too. Pray for them, and allow them to be healed. Forgive them. Reconciliation is a two-way street, not just a one-way side alley.)

Do not seek a quick fix for your guilt.
Reconciliation needs to come from
admitting, confessing, and receiving forgiveness.

   In this journey of reconciliation that I have seemed to have been taking rather frequently lately, I have noticed that there are a few road markers that tell you if you are truly heading toward restored worship. They are these:

   1. Admit what you did. Do not ignore it!

   2. Confess it was wrong. Do not excuse it!

   3. Ask for forgiveness from the one you offended. Do not seek a quick fix for your guilt!

   And when you see that you are traveling in the right direction on this journey of reconciliation, be assured that you are moving toward restored worship! God desires your heart to be humble before him. Micah 6:8 says, "He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" Worship is pleasing and acceptable to God when it comes from a heart that is humble and reconciled with others.